The Hardest Part.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
Once again, decision time.
What to do ar what to do?
To be or not to be?
Throw caution to the wind? Or hide in the bomb shelter?
Alas, to the bomb shelter to ponder.



I am of course talking about subject registration... but you guys won't believe me right? =p

Be the Bullet.

Why do bad things happen to good people?

---

Too often in life, you take things for granted. You complain, you whine, you mope. Yet, when these like these happen around you.. to friends, family and in general good people. You realized you are more blessed than you know. It acts as a wake-up call.. jotting you back into perspective. I had one some time ago, and am reminded every now and then by things like this.

says a silent prayer

One Day Like This

Warm.

Cool.

Pictures.

Friends.

Winning.

Anxiety.
Paranoia.
Sadness.

Belief.

Happiness.

Doubt.

---

Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your life.

Of Departures, Buttons & Lovers.

Death, is it really that taboo? We fear death, partly because it's the unknown, the psychologist says. We fear it because it is the end of life, the biologist says. We need not fear it at all, says the priest.

Departures, Oscar winner for best foreign picture, Japanese.
As with 99% of the motion pictures Japanese produce, be it TV dramas, animes, or in this case, full features; they have excellent soundtracks! Departures is no different.
Also also! There's Ryoko Hirosue... *drools* the only woman ever to have her face on my computer as my desktop wallpaper many many years ago. She has aged, but still very very very pretty.
Anyway, the story is about a cello player, whose orchestra disbanded, leaving his jobless. He moves back to the countryside into the house his dead mother had left him. Eventually getting a job as a "encoffin-ist" aka undertaker la.
Which leads to many stories and eventually him being ostracize from his (very pretty) wife *heartbreak* and friends.
Which led me to ponder, what's so wrong with being an undertaker.. i mean i hear they earn a lot of money, and it's probably the only job that your customers really do find you instead of the other way around.
So if i choose to be an undertaker, would the same thing happen to me.. i initially thought no.. but yea.. eventually, people will think it's an unclean job to have i guess.


Two lovers, slightly artsy film. basically about a man who 'one leg step two boats'(is there a English word for this har, bro?). Ok to watch la, i guess, got Gwyneth Paltrow ma (Chris Martin's wifey) but.. yea.. forgettable.
It really reminds me of Closer, but a weaker version, but the genre's thereabouts the same: looking at the adult relationships residing in the grey areas of the things we do in the name of love.



The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. Big movie this one, took a while but i eventually managed to get the HD version to fully savour it. Had heard a number of reviews that it was a boring show that puts you to sleep midway.Not to mention all the snubs at the Oscars. Heh.
However, after watching it i must say: I liked the movie, i really really did! it was quite long, but i found it enjoyable, not that many dull moments personally.
Basically two themes that stand out.
First, Ben and Daisy.. they met midway of their lives once.. and it was perfect. but eventually, as he was aging backwards, it was inevitable that it would bring up the cliched 'nothing lasts forever' what not.
Another one: early one when Daisy reached her early twenties and saw brad again, she danced for him and extended "invitations" but Ben turned her down.. because they felt that he was not yet at his peak and he wanted to be if he was going to be with her.
Now, let's explore this. Assuming that two people get a chance to be a couple only once in their lives, and you only have one opportunity.. wouldn't you want to be the perfect self for the one that you feel is perfect too? Hmmm hmmm hmmm? Perfection is so overrated.


Alas, fools in love. Is there any other kind of lover?

Holding Hands

It has been a week of Great Movies!

Romance is the theme of the week i guess, Frost/Nixon aside. It has been a while since i was in the mood for movies of this kind. Sort of like reviving whatever remnants of the hopeless romantic that once was. *shy*

Starting off with the only non-romance. Frost/Nixon is a rather engaging story. It's a true story so i guess that helps. OMG really: Frank Langella was superb in the movies as President Nixon!! Very creepy!!!! HOLY. Now that i've watched him i'm not exactly convinced that Sean Penn was better than him in Milk leh. Oh wells.


Sepet! Malay word for: slit eyes, refering to chinese single eye-lids. Malaysian film by Yasmin Ahmad. A very Malaysian film. One i thoroughly enjoyed. Have been wanting to watch it since i heard about it from the newspapers when it came out. Malay girl and Chinese Boy, romance, Malaysian.
I still don't know what's up with the supporting actor playing 'keong'... hahah, walao, his acting is practically as good as mine la.
LoL really couldn't tahan him when he had that heart to heart talk with Ah Loong.
Sepet is not exactly same lovely as Love Actually. Not exactly as romantic as The Notebook. One thing for damn sure: I freaking love it!
*beams with pride* Ahhh... good stuff arr~
I want to get the original uncut version of the film! Be it DVD or *shudders* VCD.
Still clueless about Sepet? Watch this then:



Good Will hunting! Is damn good! Haha, pardon the pun. Good Will Hunting, is just awesome. It really really is a good film, i can't put a finger to it, nor can't i explain exactly why. It's just, good. Go watch it!!! I guarantee you'll enjoy it! *puts seal of approval*
Dang it, would've added in to my magazine article had i watched it earlier.
Mmm hmm, so it is. Two films that going to added to my favourite movies list, no doubt about that.

Actually Good Will Hunting and Sepet are connected! Hee hee. Watch this scene.


People in singapore are complaining that a very recent family ad is a rip off of Good Will Hunting!



But as it turns out, that ad was directed by non other than Yasmin Ahmad herself! Haha. Nonetheless, i thought the ad was very nicely done though. Yasmin does admit she drew inspiration from Good Will Hunting.
People are saying that the ad encourages people to lower their standards and get married.
ROFL! Ahhhh, 开心就好 everyone. :p

and so the hopeless romantic awakes, jumps around happily while listening to Jason Mraz - Lucky.
and falls back to his ageless slumber when the song ends.

---

Finished Twilight. The unabridged audiobook. I've been listening to it to and from work, quite a few interesting things that were missing from the movie as expected.
But having said that, it's a super click-lit la -_-
pfft. i read on the newspaper sometime back that Twillight was dubbed the new Harry Potter. BACKSIDE la!
LOL, eh, wait. Or was it meant for the little girls who grew up reading harry potter? Hmmm, that would make so much more sense.
Walao, totally cannot tahan the "romance" part of the stories lo. Zzz. Rubbish
Mmm hmmm, onto New Moon unabridged to accompany me when traveling on the mrt.


Will really need to start with my IA report next week. No more procrastinations~ and distractions~
and so ladies and gentlemen, it's that time of the week again: Friday!
lalala. Going home tomorrow.
Peace out.


“喂，从今天起，你就跟着我，你是我的女人” - My roomie, his dream line for girls? lol.

"Opps, i think i got feeling liao" - Friend of my roommate, after reluctantly going on a date with a girl who likes him but whom he had "no feeling" towards.

"Don't stereotype people. Not every Chinaman is a cheat and not every Malay is lazy." - Keong
"Ah, but that's where you're wrong... Every Malay is.. [cuts off] " - Orked
She was going to say LAZY. ROFL!!!! The Malaysian Film Board censored it!!!! :D
You gotta love Sepet. Really. *heart melts*








OMG!!!! Just after i finished this blog, i freaking found this!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! Cute.
*heart evaporates*

42.

A group of hyper-intelligent pan-dimensional beings demand to learn the Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything from the supercomputer, Deep Thought, specially built for this purpose.
It took Deep Thought 7½ million years to compute and check the answer, which turns out to be 42.
-The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.

“Those who are dead, are not dead, they’re just living in my head.”
- Coldplay - "42".
When asked if the song's title was Hitchhiker's-related, Chris Martin said, "It is and it isn't."

Those that watch lost: 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, and 42.
42 explains itself once again, and it is no coincidence. Hoho.



42.
You’re looking at the answer to life, the universe and everything. And I am not joking. Google the answer to life, the universe and everything and see what come up :p for those lazy bums there too lazy to type,click here.

Alas, that question has been lingering in my mind for quite a few weeks now. Watched The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy again just to have a little fun and found what i was looking for. So, what is the answer to life, the universe and everything? Seriously.

Ahhh.. the fragilities of human relationships. Indeed, it is a widely known and documented fact that human relationships are fragile and too unpredictable. Thus, it is widely advised in Zen books and what not, that to achieve real happiness, so to speak, one has to let go of worldly possessions. “Worldly Possessions”. Hah.
To narrow human relationships down, every teenager and young adult’s best/worst friend: Boy-Girl Relationships! The reason for my lamenting then. Not because of me, I have somewhat resigned to the beautiful fact that my life is sufficient with me, family, friends. The soloist. Hehe. Nothing ventured nothing gained does have its benefits.

Close friends, and not so close ones, and some acquaintances have been facing crisis in relationships. Unrequited, changed of heart, cheated, doubts, prolonged heartache. What is a friend to do at these times? I feel utterly sad, at the same time knowing that there isn’t much that I can do apart from muttering a silent prayer and some show of concern. Helplessness sucks. =(

Which begs the question: What is the meaning in life then? If supposed, tomorrow, you find the love of your life, and indeed, the feelings are mutual. Fantastic! You’ll be overjoyed, jumping up and down, looking around and asking yourself, my gosh, life is bloody brilliant, it has so much colour, food tastes damn good. *plot twist* But to what end?
If the uncertainty in life sets it so that what you have today, might not necessary be yours tomorrow, and everyone is on the roller coaster of life, what is the point? (Religious viewpoints aside). Assuming that you can do well for 364 days in a year and have it wiped out in the 365th day.
But having said that, the converse holds true as well. Life is like that. It is unpredictable. It has ups and downs. You know well enough that it’s as volatile holding dynamite and walking in the desert. It is this exact same point that life is what it is. It is by not knowning the future that allows you to create it. Balancing the equation would mean that there is no more puzzle left to solve. i.e. no more point in life?

Hmmm. I seem to have reached a point of cognitive dissonance once again.

[CONTROL] [ALTERNATE] [DELETE]

---

Whoever said ignorance is bliss clearly hasn’t experienced cognitive dissonance before. Haha.

Which brings me to another topic: Damien Rice. Although I personally think that Damien Rice is absolutely brilliant, I am very much reluctant to.. .. share his brilliance,
just because it’s not exactly a good thing to do. The reason being, Damien is the most depressing thing out there in the market, it would be impossible to listen to 9 Crimes without finding a tinge of sadness (huge understatement), but yea, the point is, Damien isn’t very conducive for a happy and positive state of mind. But then, he’s not that extreme as to compel you to slit your wrists, just pure blissful sadness. I’ve tried to minimize listening time on Damien, and no doubt, life was that much brighter. Yet, time and time again, I’ll return to that cave, dark, hidden, alone. Now, if you would like a tiny taste to what it’s like to be in the cave: here you go. Not for the fainted hearted, and the depressed.

Damien is not everyone’s cup of tea, thank heavens! Otherwise, we would have everyone walking around like Marvin the Paranoid Android! Either you'll think he’s ok, or you find his bedside moping a pain and wonder why would anyone want to listen to the rubbish funeral tunes



All in all, this is probably just a senseless rant, fuelled by events around me (not involving me per se, so do not worry) an ounce of Damien Rice, and Marvin the paranoid android!!! :D


**lalala, jumps around and continues being happy with Marvin whispering random thoughts in the ear.**



Oh ya, haha, I am getting old! I totally forgot to mention about my birthday. Doh~
It was a quiet affair, which is good. Phone calls from near and far, texts, wall posts, songs, burgers, cakes, subway, soup, friends, family - The things that matter.
Life is good wad~ :p (cognitive dissonance is bliss)

Birthday wish? The same as the previous couple of years:
Health and Happiness to family and friends.
Everything else is secondary. =)
cheers

Broken

Here i am again.
It took a while.
But nonetheless i am here

Took me longer than expected for yea,
this is be a long and quite random post.

Went for badminton today, been having fun ever since finding badminton kaki again.
Which brings me to - badminton racquets.
Always liked badminton racquets, they cost quite a lot, and all of my past racquets have been passed from my dad to me.. since he retired from playing badminton, i pretty much took control of the racquets. There are 2 in particular, both PRO-ACE. I brought one to singapore when i first came to ntu.
This is what it looks like

Red strings, changed the handle grip a year ago.

I think my recent badminton skills must have improved a lot. Cos this evening, while i was racing for a shot and taking a swing... this happened:

It broke in half! -_-

I've never seen a badminton racquet split like this ever, and it's not those cheap racquets, nor did i hit the floor... i merely took a swing at the shuttlecock!
The whole thing broke off and flew across another court, thankfully no one got hit. Zzzz.

Was contemplating not throwing the racquet away, eh, no la, it's beyond repair so i wasn't exactly planning on keeping it.. but throwing it away.. I'm too sentimental about these things i guess. But regardless, it's in the dumpster now.
I need to go back home to take my racquet! Hoho, should take the better one. Hahaha.

---

Damn cliché it is, but seriously, you only live once. There are many things in life that you only get to experience once. Things that you only have one chance to do. That's part of the beauty isn't it? There will be times, no doubt, when you wish that you can just survive this period (eg exam weeks, assignment deadlines) but, if you do so, you probably just risk throwing your life away by endless wishing it to pass you by sooner, don't you agree?
Ahhh. With Perpetual Motion 2 done and dusted, i pretty much wrapped up the biggest challenge as Publications Secretary of MAE club. It's been quite the ride really, too many stories, of angry, of disappointment, of gratitude, of happiness, of satisfaction, and most importantly- of growth. There was much hesitation the night before i decided to submit the forms to run for the portfolio, many doubts, a tinge of laziness. In retrospect, i'm happy i did push myself that extra mile. Being a "leader" of sorts, you learn things about yourself.
Leadership, learned from the OBS trip to Pulau Ubin that there are 3 main parts of leadership: Process, People, Product. I have noticed that i am more of a Product and People type. The process is damn messsed up, partly due to my insecurities about asking for help from other people. Heh, and when i do decide to take a chance on someone, hohoho, he goes and do a shitty job for me, which makes me wonder why the hell did i do it in the first place. GAH, this is getting out of hand, too whiny.
One major thing i learned: I need to learn how to disagree agreeably. Most of the time i just get wayyy too engrossed in thinking: "WHAT THE BLOODY HELL ARE YOU THINKING".
The other thing realize is that many things are not meant to be taken personally. I feel that throughout the working process for the magazine, i might have inadvertently stepped on some toes, but yea.. the may sound damn cold, but it's honestly isn't anything personal at all. (Actually, it's the toes stepping that made me realize: I need to know how to disagree agreeably realization)
Mmmm hmmm, i truly enjoyed the challenge though. It's by pushing yourself to the limit and challenge your self-perceived boundaries that you are able to become better.
With that said, i really am thankful for my subcomms. Throughout the whole thing i was trying to be the kind of leader that i would've wanted if i were in their shoes. Hope i did alright.
Special thanks to you-know-who, your experience and assistance given is greatly appreciated.
As you would have put it: 多来买家私 (Cantonese)

Life ar life.. Been a little down lately. Thinking about the future in general. Just had a very brief briefing about the final year major prescribed electives and the options for specialization that we have. At the crossroads once again, not sure what to choose. Maritime seems the way to go with good money. Biology has always been my interest so biomedical engineering is appealing too. Then been doing a lot programming in my attachment as well and it's rather fun and i would like to think i'm pretty good at it :p... haha.
But then.. doubts everywhere. Hahaha. Well, do have another couple of months to think about it, but hor.. Final Year Project (FYP) selection is sooner than that leh.. and it said that it would be good if the FYP topic you select synergizes with the subjects you choose.. so.. yea.

Wah, if you have managed to read until here, i salute you!! LOL. (it's been pretty boring rants and all no?). So... Let me reward you with a little interesting tidbit.
In totally side note, there's this co-worker at autodesk, not an intern, two cubicles away. And of late, i am slightly alarmed and disturbed that i am finding her.. .. attractive. More alarmed than disturbed, i mean, that's nothing much to be disturbed right, though i am beginning to think i stare at her too often, LOL.
She's older, tall, no skirts, all jeans, no high-heels, all sneakers. Dang. Everytime she walks by.. she unwittingly tugs my heartstrings. (Not her fault, i know :p)
Hah, anyway, i'm sure it's just a phase.

Peace out.

-

Alas! I am backz.
After what, like almost 4 weeks?! Woot... after the longest time, i've finally changed my blog description! It used to read 'lights will guide you home'... and i thought it was high time that it got a change. There were a few contenders, 'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger' was one.. but yea, a little too strong that one though the events of the past months have tempt me to choose that. 'Happiness is only real when shared' this came in a close second.. was torn between the two: in the end.. well i choose the one that you're seeing on the top of the page now.

First of all, let me say: I HAVE FREAKING SURVIVED PERPETUAL MOTION 2!!
And i will not want to talk anything more about it in this entry.

Ahhh... The air of a free man is good stuff.
Been on a movie frenzy since regaining my time, Twilight, Definitely Maybe, Defiance, Paul Blart Mall Cop.
Twilight? If being a vampire means perfect skin, no need to sleep ever, super fast reflexes and all, please... count me in. Hah. Apart from that, quite ok movie la.. Still don't know what all the fuss about Robert Pattinson is about though.. Kristen Steward on the other hand is a pretty! Her character was so so lousy though, "Edward, edward, i can't live without your love!!". Argh.. zero character development in the movie.
Paul Blart? Do not watch it. Unless you really really REALLY have nothing else better to do.
Definitely Maybe is... GOOD! Wah, the best chic-flick i've been in a long long time.
Defiance? Not bad either heh. Had a mix of morality and leadership ethics in the story too, so yea.

Walao.. i had so much to write about yet now gone blank. Zzzz.
Will blog again soon i guess. :p

The Pot of Gold.

The day was fine. Rain coming in finally after a couple weeks of insane heat.

And so there i was, working OT a little, towards the end of the stint for the day.

"Anthony Anthony, come take picture.. rainbow."
I went over with the handphone, looked out, and saw this:

-From the 8th floor of Fusionopolis, Buona Vista.

Awestruck.
I honestly can't remember when was the last time i saw a rainbow. And this one certainly brightened up my day. =)

"Go walk to the end and get the pot of gold" - Suryanto, colleague/supervisor.
"Nah, i want 4D number" - Colleague from QA division.
"The only number you'll find is the DID (defect ID number) - Keng Leng
..... lol (we fix software defects, fyi)


Ahh.. life has been quite good i would say. I am enjoying work (surprised too, i am). All's well. Things just feel like jigsaws falling into place you know. The picture might not be perfect but nonetheless, i am content :)
There just a little shadow of a thing called Perpetual Motion 2 lingering over the shoulder that's all :p
2 intense weeks coming up. Will blog thereafter. Cheerio.

when i see you smile.

Moonlight lit walk paths
The weather rather warm with a tinge of breeze
It blows gently as if not to rush the lovers taking a midnight stroll

Quite the sight , couples walking along, some holding hands, some talking enthusiastically while taking in the moment of closeness
Sharing, caring and connecting
For a moment the world fades, and all that's left is the flower in your embrace.


The trembling hand
The unsteady leg
The blush of the cheeks as you turn the corner
sweat creeks down

Nothing unusual, nothing strange.. close to nothing at all
Nonchalance is merely a shield for the heart, albeit a weak one
But faced with competition
the flight of fight that leaves the scene
It's not that we're scared, it's just that its delicate.

When i see you smile, it feels like i'm falling..

---

Anyways, that was valentine's, post-midnight.. along nanyang crescent. (and yes, i was walking alone :p )
All's good. Not to worry. :)

As usual for a Saturday, like always, i went to church for sunset mass.
took bus 199, alighted .. but different from usual, i walked instead, through the HDB flats in attempt to find a shortcut. according to Pythagoras theorem, it would be there, haha. In the end, i think the distances were more or less equal. Anyways, while walking (it takes about 10mins from the bus stop to church), there was this indian man that called out to me, 'boy, boy..'
like any other well adjusted Malaysian citizen who has been told numerous insanely terrible horror stories about robbery and what not - the first instinct that came to mind was: walk away, and there'll be no trouble. But then, the old man called to me, and despite the cynical thought that had reached my frontal lobe first, reason arrived soon after. Two things: one, i am in singapore not malaysia. Two, i am going to church and it would be insanely hypocritical if i hadn't stopped to help a man that seemingly needed it. (a 'what would Jesus do' moment of sorts, haha)

Anyways, so i walked towards the old man, he said he was it pain and he can't walk anymore. Well then, i then asked him to sit down and rest. I processed to call the ambulance (first time ever!). Took out the handphone, dialed 112 (don't know whether 999 works or not). Anyway, my description of the emergency was 'err.. there's a old man, indian, who seems to have difficulty walking'. Hah, on hindsight, it seems a weak description :D but it was really the best i could muster given the situation leh. Then the operator asked for the address, then i had no look to the nearest HDB block which read '176 boon lay ave'. They say they'll send an ambulance. So i waited with the indian guy lo. He took out his IC.. then i saw 1962 as the birth date. Thus, old man probably wasn't exactly a good description of the guy. Anyways, aiyoh, while waiting with him, was damn anxious la. First of all, he was really really in pain. The guy was crying while sitting on the pavement, what do you think? And the first aid knowledge that i had was 3 years in the red crescent during primary school! HAH.
So, yes, i was next to useless. Then i began to worry, since the guy was groaning and tearing about how much pain he was in, how long would it take for the ambulance so arrive? I told him that i knew it must be painful and to bear with it lo, useless in terms of practicality but what else was i supposed to do? Of course, i asked whether he fell, how did he hurt himself that kind of stuff but yea, he only said there was a 'metal' in his leg and it was very painful ( so i guess from a past surgery?). Then the police called, asking whether i needed police assistance. I told them it was fine and that i would just wait with him till the ambulance arrives (this call came a minute after i had made the call for ambulance).
Like i was saying, i had no idea how fast/slow the ambulance would arrive. Then, yet again, i imagined what it would be like in malaysia, probably will take a long long time. 2 minutes later, the ambulance had arrived! Could you believe it? So it basically just took 3 minutes, 4 minutes tops, for an ambulance to arrive la. Wah, i am freaking impressed with singapore's civil defence la. Excellent efficiency.
And so the paramedics came, i told them everything i knew, which was very little. Stayed for a while longer till then brought him to the ambulance, then continued my walk to church lo.


Haha, as usual, i think i might have blogged far far too detailed for my own good. :p
Anyways, i have watched Gran Torino and Revolutionary Road. I simply loved Gran Torino!! Clint Eastwood's last acting role in a film i think? Wah, i tell you. I wasn't really keen on watching it at first. I recall hearing a friend say that the ending is quite unexpected. In the end, i really loved the movie!! It's probably just right behind Slumdog in my list of movies from this past year. I could totally relate to Clint Eastwood's character. It's unbelievable how old fashioned, i am.. in some case la. :p Check out this nice piece of music from the soundtrack :)!
Next, Revolutionary Road. Hah, when i first saw this trailer, i think it was about october last year? I had all these hopes that it would like a romantic love story the likes of the notebook. Hah, it turned out to be quite the opposite really. But nonetheless, a very good movie too! Ahh, so many good movies lately, i am glad :)
Oh ya, the oscars. I tip Slumdog to win best picture la, although i myself havent watchecd benjamin button and frost/nixon yet. But still, it's a feeling. Will blog again after watching those two. But hor, for the category of best supporting actor right: i know Heath Ledge is favourite to win for sentimental reasons la, and i think it's nice too. But that guy from Revolutionary Road. Wah i tell you.. his performance was top-drawer, absolutely top-drawer. Even better than Philip Sermour Hoffman in Doubt. Wahhhh.
Oh ya, watched Nick and Norah's infinite playlist too.. cute movie.

Have more to write but will wait till next time. Ahhhh. It's sunday night already, monday again tomorrow.... Cheerio people =)